Ericka Page is Living in the Moment

Coming from a multi-racial musical family, singer-songwriter Ericka Page learned early on in life that music had the power to bring people together. Ericka’s exposure to music was eclectic to say the least, starting in a Southern Baptist children’s choir and hanging out with Britney Spears, NSYNC, and Fergie watching her mom (a business manager) handle the business side of things. As comfortable behind the mic as in front of it, she is coming out of COVID with new music, a new book, and a new identity.

Formerly pop singer Trevor Page, Ericka came out as trans this year, inspired by a time of reflection and solitude during COVID. With two albums and several appearances as Trevor, she was promoted as the “boy toy pop singer” and while a success in the industry, never felt complete. If music is the language of the soul, her music was not telling her story. Nearly five years since her last single, “Now Is the Moment,” (perhaps her best song to date) is a true coming-out anthem, a result of a creation started by Trevor Page now being fully realized by Ericka Page.

Her music has been featured in film and television, but she also acts as composer and music producer, recently scoring the documentary Streetlight Harmonies now streaming on Amazon. Ericka’s love of storytelling has also extended into the literary realm, adding author to her resume, with the anticipated release of her fantasy novel A Marvel of Magick: Madden and the Dark Unicorns of Danuk. Not only is she embracing her identity as a woman, but she is also embracing her identity as a fantasy nerd, and we are here for it.

What inspired your coming out as trans? 

It was really a matter of survival. I’ve always known I was different, but I found ways, as most of us do, to try and navigate to a fulfilling life. You’ll just never really have that until you are able to be fully honest with yourself. It can be extremely difficult, and although we can often say, “oh I don’t care what people think of me,” most of us still must consider our place in society, work, and our families. The fear of rejection and discrimination can be crippling, and without any positive role models or examples of a happy existence, it can feel impossible. Gender dysphoria was something I was desperately suffering from, even though it wasn’t easy to admit it. Life was losing its beauty and I was really struggling. It wasn’t a good place to be. I had to transition or something worse was coming. My life has changed so profoundly for the better since finding the courage to live authentically. I am happier and more excited about everything than I ever have been, and I think more people are noticing me now than ever before because of it. 

How early in your life’s journey did you start to feel that you were not a boy? 

I think as soon as I was able to have that thought. I was different from the beginning, and even before I suppose. My mother “knew she was having a girl,” and the doctors confirmed to my parents their bun in the oven was indeed female. I was brought home in a pink blanket, even though they realized something was a little different. I told my mom I was a girl when I was four years old. It was just a different time and place. No one knew what this really meant in rural Florida when I was younger. Thankfully, things have gotten better but we still have our work cut out for us. It’s just another reason to share this information with others. 

You have had to come out twice, first as gay, and secondly as trans. Was it hard the second time around? 

Both had their share of anxiety. Strange that just saying “I am a woman” should be so scary. Or that being a woman should be so scary to anyone else. What is so scary about being a woman? But of course, it is being a trans woman that many people have problems with. And even that strikes me as so strange now. Why does anyone who doesn’t know me care about what I do with my life? The actual transition part just feels like such a natural, almost trivial part of my life now. It’s more about how I am going to live and what I am going to do with my life now that is exciting for me. And my family is great. Takes some getting used to, being I was a grown adult when I transitioned, but I am blessed. 

What advice do you have for someone coming as trans? 

Keep going and be strong! I can’t convey how much better life is living authentically. And really, I don’t even feel I was truly alive before my transition. I was just going through life in a survival suit. Find people, friends, a family who are supportive and will be kind through the journey. Learn what your loves and delights are in life and try to do them as often as you can, ideally being able to make a career out of some of them. Having a conducive work life and people who love you are extremely important to survival. Sometimes we don’t have family who supports us, but there are many great communities and organizations who can also offer help, even if it’s remote online. The Los Angeles LGBT Center is an incredible resource for trans information and community.

You grew up singing in a Baptist church, what is your relationship with religion today? 

I did grow up in the church. There are wonderful people doing wonderful things, and there are not so wonderful people doing not so wonderful things, as in any other group. You know, I try to be respectful of others’ beliefs, but I’m just not too sure. I’d say I’m agnostic or roundabout. I think there’s something special going on, but I just don’t have enough information to make a declaration. And not that there isn’t plenty of work to do, but there is so much beauty in nature, and love and happiness that is all around us too that seems utterly divine. I think that is where I want to try and stay.

Your music career was established as your given boy persona. Is it difficult to look back at your success as a musician and past videos as Trevor? 

Double-edged. I worked hard on that material and I’m proud of it, but I also know how troubled that boy was. Not that life is just perfect now, but the basis of being able to be your authentic self, that foundation is incomparable.  I think I always tried to ‘give it’ as an artist, but now I feel a freedom that was elusive to me before. 

How have your fans responded?  

Incredibly. I’ve only released one song and the video is on the way, but I have more lovely comments and ‘followers’ and support than ever. And a lot of DMs from hotties. [Laughs] How did that happen? 

How has your creative process changed since coming out, or has it? 

That hasn’t changed too much. I write from life experiences or observations and I am inspired by just about everything. Sometimes a message is just itching to get into an audio wave and things come together effortlessly, but other times I really have to chisel at a piece for a while. And yet other times, as a composer I just let the music and melody lead the way and the lyrics come later. It just depends. There is no one way it happens.  

Your new single “Now (The Moment)” is pretty emotional. I have never heard your voice so strong and plaintive. What was it like recording the vocals as your first single as Ericka? 

Well, I wrote and recorded most of the song before my transition, but it was something I had begun thinking about. I was feeling pretty low when I wrote it, sort of a song to lift myself up and anyone else who might hear it and vibe with it. But now, with the transition, it has an additional relevance. 

What does “Now (The Moment)” mean to you? 

It is an empowerment anthem mostly. The song encourages listeners to try to live more in the moment but also points out our ability to take advantage of each moment. This time is yours. What are you going to do with it?

You directed your music video…how was this time different, seeing yourself frame by frame who you truly are?  

When I’m directing, I am 100% focused on making a good product, regardless of who or what the subject of filming is. But it is definitely nice to finally see myself on the screen correctly. I think there is new confidence… and a bit more skin showing.

Sexuality in the LGBTQ musician industry sells. We see the thirsty Instagram from artists and the popularity they have for their shirtless, sexy image. How does sexuality now play a part in your brand? 

As I mentioned I do think I’ve gained a bit more confidence to explore more of that side of myself. In the video, I am showing more skin than I ever have. Maybe not as much as Beyonce, but it’s not totally modest either, lol. It’s honestly been a ton of fun. I’m excited about every shoot. 

We deal with a lot of body issues in the LGBTQ community. Has coming out made you more in tune with your body? What advice do you have for anyone in our community not feeling comfortable in their own skin? 

I feel way more in tune with my body and my soul. I was such a modified version of myself before my transition. I just knew society saw me as a boy and I did plenty of silly things that were not natural to me to fit in. I would deepen my voice, or I would stiffen my motion because, subconsciously or not, this is what I thought I had to be to succeed. This was the only way I thought I would be desirable to society or to a partner. But ask yourself, if I lived in a place where there were no other people, or if I got to live my wildest dreams, who would I be? And then be that person. It’s not easy but the rewards are great.

Now you’re an author? When did that happen? What inspired you to sit down and write? 

I’m a big ol’ fantasy nerd. I read a decent amount and I wanted to write a story of my own. I wrote the book ‘A Marvel of Magick : Madden and the Dark Unicorns of Danuk’ slowly over about six years. Initially, it was going to be a total children’s book, but as I wrote, the subject got a little more serious, although there is a lot of magic and merpeople and unicorns. I also wanted to write something with a lead character who is in the LGBT community. I didn’t see anyone like me on the page when I was younger, so I wanted to change that for others. 

Why are you so obsessed with unicorns? 

I DON’T KNOW! [Laughs] But it’s real.

What audience is your book geared towards? 

I’d say sixth grade and above. There are a couple of teenage situations, but nothing too adult. 

What was your feeling when typing “THE END” for the first time? 

Well, it was short-lived happiness… because after the first “the end” there were plenty of edits afterward! But having finally finished the project feels great. There will be more happening in that world to come too. I’m excited for people to read it. 

What does Pride mean to you this year? 

I am prouder than I ever have been. Everything feels so much more in line and correct. As a transgender woman, I just hope I can be a positive example in this time of so much discrimination. We have some work to do, but having proud examples living out loud is important. 

What’s up ahead? 

I am so excited to share more music with everyone. I have an album worth of songs coming and the music video for ’Now (The Moment)’ will be released in the next few weeks. Please add me to your playlist! I’ve also written a few scripts and will be directing a few short films. And my paperback book ‘A Marvel of Magick : Madden and the Dark Unicorns of Danuk’ is currently available online at Barnes and Noble, Target, Amazon, and most places books are sold. Take the adventure!

You can follow Ericka Page on IG: @theErickaPage

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